I visited Green Bay in Wisconsin,
Yearning to see its famous green colored bay.
I looked and looked each day,
But I could not find a bay with green water.
The Americans must have been crazy to call it Green Bay.

I visited Liverpool in England,
Hoping to see livers floating in every pool in Liverpool.
There was no liver and no pool in public parks, there, at all.
Why is Liverpool a city without a liver and a pool?
The English must have forgotten to drop a liver in their pool.

I visited Moscow in Russia.
There was neither a single mosque and nor a cow,
Though the city was called Moscow.
Those idiots in Russia must have thought it was easy raising a cow in the mosque.
Also, they had forgotten to build a mosque and bought a cow to see if they could raise it.

I visited the hot city of Bombay in India,
Thinking there was terrorists, planting a bomb, there.
I kept praying for no bomb in India's bay
Because I was too young to die, and especially, did not want to die on foreign soil.
To my surprise, there was not a bomb and no bay in India. Thank God.

I visited Sidney, Australia,
Wondering why the Australians used my best friend 's name.
May be Sidney became famous when he was there.
But Sidney was only a taxi driver in California,
Not a famous person in Australia to have his name used for a city.

I visited the city of Tamale in Ghana,
Thinking the native African would sell tamales like the Mexicans.
I could not find restaurants that sold tamales
And was so depressed not to have tasted my favorite food, there, in Tamale.
The Africans must have love the taste of tamales in order to call their city Tamale.
But where did they first tasted the tamales?

I sat in my beach house in Newport Beach,
California,
Wondering why people had named those cities so weirdly.
I sat in my expensive beach house,
Realizing I was living in a city that had a weird name, too.
There had never been a new port, built on that beach.

Written by: Tri Tran
February 16, 2006